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Sesani Legend Username: Sesani Post Number: 51642 Registered: 08-2014 Posted From: 69.114.184.2 Rating: N/A |
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Platypus Side Hero Username: Platypus Post Number: 6393 Registered: 01-2008 Posted From: 82.19.11.233 Rating: N/A |
At an Acapulco Hotel: The Manager has personally passed the water served here. On the menu of a Swiss Restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for At a Bangkok Drycleaner's: Drop your pants here for best results On a toy doll package in Spain: Laughs while you throw up At a German Campground: It is strictly forbidden ... That people of different sex, for instance men and women, live together in one tent, unless they are married with each other for that purpose. At a former restaurant in Clarendon: Our cooks would be glad to prepare and serve you at our new location. In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk. In a Hong Kong tailor's shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs. At a Copenhagen airline office: We take your bags and send them in all directions. In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not have children in the bar In a tailor's shop in Rhodes: Order your summer suits. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation. In a Tokyo hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To more the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order. In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11am daily. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday. In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension. On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; Limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion. Outside a Brussels dress shop: Dresses for street walking. From the Soviet Weekly: There will be a Moscow exhibition of arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years. In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose. In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists. In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our Horse-driven city tours. We guarantee no miscarriages. In a Budapest •••: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty. Sign outside a doctor's office in Rome: Specialist in women and other diseases. In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run. From a Japanese information booklet about using hotel airconditioner: Cooles and heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself. From a brochure of a car rental in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor. Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking. Here speeching American. Second hand car dealer: Somewhere in USA Why go elsewhere to be cheated? |